Today I start another new cereal. This cereal is the classic cereal, if you were playing Family Fortunes and Les Dennis said “we’ve asked a hundred people to name a breakfast cereal” I would be amazed if this was not the top answer. It is of course Kellogg’s Cornflakes. With the exception of Porridge Oats they are the oldest cereal around which when you consider they were initially an accident is pretty impressive. I wonder if brothers Dr. John Harvey Kellogg and Will Keith Kellogg ever realised what an empire would be built on the solid foundation of cornflakes. Not literally, they would crumble into a fine golden powder.
Of all the cereals in the quest this is probably the one I know best so I was looking forward to my bowl this morning, they are a fresh crisp golden flake of corn with a slightly malty tang that I can’t put my finger on at the moment. They were like eating an old friend, in a way. Having just finished Nestle Coco Orange Shreddies made me realise how quickly these can go soggy, in my eyes they need to be crispy so I certainly did not pour milk all over them, I carefully poured down an open golden tunnel down the inside of the bowl.
I sprinkled lightly with sugar which is through habit and many years practice in getting these just how I like them. I also had a bowl before football tonight but unfortunately I didn’t have a good game, I don’t solely blame the Kellogg’s Cornflakes but they don’t give you the energy boost of a massively sugary breakfast cereal.
I will get in touch with Kellogg’s to see if they have any serving suggestions.
Kellogg’s Cornflakes Review
Today the plan was to start my detox, to stop eating junk and lose a bit of weight. I sat down first thing with my deliciously fresh Kellogg’s Cornflakes, each little flake staring at me with excitement in their eyes. As discussed yesterday pouring the milk down the inside edge of the bowl seems the best way of keeping as many Kellogg’s Cornflakes as possible crispy. Unfortunately I was tired so my limp sleepy arm let down the team and poured the milk down the outside edge of the bowl, which was a fairly wet mess of a start to the day.
After I had managed to clean up the mess before my wife came downstairs with our daughter I sat and treasured another bowl of these golden treats. I didn’t even turn the TV on, I wanted to enjoy them just me, the corn flakes and the bowl, which was wet at the base because I had forgotten that for some reason, when liquid spills out of a bowl or a cup it wraps itself round the base like its clinging on for dear life and then settles itself in your clothing, in my case this morning a pair of almost fashionable blue checked lounging trousers.
The detox had started well, Kellogg’s Cornflakes themselves were acting as part of the detox, detoxing all the ‘junk’ cereals and replacing with pureness. I got myself a bowl of cornflakes to take in to work and have at lunch too. Once I got to work I remembered that tomorrow I have to go to the NEC in Birmingham to a trade show, bad news for the detox, guaranteed Little Chef breakfast on the way up, and with little option probably more bad food for lunch. At lunch time I decided to have lunch, which is a decision I make on a pretty much daily basis. I sat down with my cornflakes and thought I would process a few returns as I had a pile stacking up. This is when I got very annoyed, this is due to pompous buffoons who want to make everything ‘green’, don’t get me wrong, I like the environment, what I don’t like is sacrificing a perfectly good bowl of Kellogg’s Cornflakes because some dufus has returned something in an environmentally friendly, recycled ‘Green Jiffy Bag’, made ‘green’ by replacing bubble wrap with layers upon layers of mashed up debris that looks like a combination torn up old newspaper, the contents of my Henry vacuum cleaner and the fluff you get on the filter in your tumble dryer. Which when you tear open explodes and little bits of dusty litter layer themselves over a previously edible bowl of cornflakes. I was annoyed I was fed up and felt like burning down a tree to get my own back on ‘green’ things, but a) I like trees and b) I’m not brave enough.
As you can imagine this made my day frustrating but when I was just leaving work I got a text that was cheerful and encouraging from a friend who shall remain nameless:
How lucky I am to have friends like these.
Today I got up early for another bowl of Kellogg’s Corn Flakes which I would describe as ‘textbook’. I still can’t put my finger on what the taste is that I love, it’s sort of malty, sweet and homely. I got up early because I had to go to Birmingham to a trade show which was tiring but pleasurable because I met some friendly northerners and a man called ‘Dave Gorman’ who was trying to sell me ironing board covers. Which is only really exciting for people who watched ‘Are You Dsve Gorman?’ years back.
It was a couple of hours in the back of a hire car (as none of our 3 cars between us can be trusted to drive 2 hours without the assistance of the RAC) and it gave me time to think about yesterday’s cereal quest Jiffy bag incident, so to get things off my chest I wrote to Pregis who (after lots of research) manufacture Jiffy Bags:
I am writing to you with regard to a problem I had yesterday with one of your ‘green’ Jiffy bags. I was sat innocently eating a bowl of Kellogg’s Corn Flakes (which i had managed to keep crispy having devised a clever way to pour the milk in) at work on my lunch break and received a parcel packaged in the aforementioned ‘green’ Jiffy bag. I tore it open (as I find this the best way to identify its contents) and the contents of the bags stuffing propelled into the air like the contents of a party popper. This a) flew up my nasal passages creating a humourous sounding sneeze and b) engulfed my bowl of Kellogg’s Corn Flakes and made it look like I was sitting down to eat the contents of my vacuum cleaner. This was incredibly frustrating, it also got all over my delightfully knitted cardigan and was a right royal pain to remove as I did not have a lint brush to hand. I’m all for saving the planet, I recycle myself (or did until last week when our recycle bin ended up getting blown away by strong winds), I happily buy from charity shops, I have even been to extreme lengths to make sure I grow my own vegetables without slugs gobbling them up but I really think your green bags are a step too far. Analysing roughly the average cost of a bowl of cereal (which i have been doing recently) there was about 31 pence worth of Kellogg’s Corn Flakes ruined by your bags abundance of dusty grubby filling.
Like my two gerbils Jazzamatazz and Bella I know you can’t make these corn flakes come back but I just thought you should know this is happening. I can’t be the only person who’s breakfast cereal been ruined by your bags.
This made me feel slightly better about things, at least until I stood (for what seemed like the length of time between my birthdays) staring, waiting for an automatic door to open with people gathering behind me only to realise that the door was not automatic and even after I saw the ‘Push’ sign I still stood, glaring at it with the same facial expression I made as a 11 year old boy telling mum I had accidentally lost a shoe over the fence of a strangers garden playing ‘flick-a-shoe’ golf. I was hoping, willing, begging this door to open. It didn’t. I then pushed it. It did.
This day was to be a test for Kellogg’s Corn Flakes, the first day of my ‘detox’, no junk, salad at lunch. The fuel for the day, the energy giver, was my bowl of Kellogg’s Corn Flakes. I got in to work and had a slight back log having been away yesterday in sunny Birmingham, I knew I was going to need all the energy I could get, I kept thinking about the barley malt in corn flakes, the flavour, the crispiness, if there is something that this cereal quest has taught me it is to stop, think and appreciate all these cereals I am lucky enough to try, sometimes I chuck them down my oesophagus so fast I don’t even taste it. Interestingly and with lent coming up I read this which comes up on a similar theme.
I think it talks more sense than I usually do, so for today this will be all, a chance to think and reflect……starting from……now.
With the detox now in full swing today was to be another ’2 bowl day’. I of course today wanted to focus on appreciating this classic and much loved cereal more. Much like vanilla, Kellogg’s Corn Flakes have become the norm and are quite often ignored for more exciting options. Even when chosen, often I would be guilty of not stopping and appreciating them. Today was different. With my daughter and wife still peacefully sleeping I spent a little more time than usual on them, I chewed for longer, I tried to taste more, a deeper, cleaner flavour to savour. It was a great breakfast, I think if you said to anyone before they ate that they should taste it like it would be their last meal it would taste better, thats the attitude I took in to them. At lunch time I was in more of a rush and had to be a bit quicker with the consumption, it seemed a bit of a waste of a meal in comparison to breakfast, I have now had 8 servings of these and still enjoy them, this says a lot about the golden crunchy beauties. Energy wise having cereal for breakfast and cereal for lunch should leave me knackered, however I am almost proud to say I got a high score on just my 2nd attempt of ‘Livin La Vida Loca’ on Just Dance 4 tonight, not that I’m bragging.
As starts to a day go getting up and going downstairs to find an envelope with a substantial amount of cash in that had come through the front door anonymously is quite a strange one. Perplexed and confused I wandered to the kitchen and poured out the last of my Kellogg’s Cornflakes, the golden flakes of malty corn were today topped with a nice thick dusting of powdered cornflakes that had been created at the bottom of the box, i poured the milk on, gave a light dusting of sugar and sat down to enjoy. They were amazing, the dust at the bottom of Kellogg’s Corn Flakes is the best around, at least of all the cereals I have tried so far.
Here are Kellogg’s Cornflakes vital statistics:
Cereal Cost: £2.09.
Real Servings per Box: 9
Cost per Serving: 23p
Pros – A classic taste, great dust at the bottom of the box, great cost.
Cons – Can need sugar to sweeten things up a little.
Here is an interesting couple of charts for the quest so far: